[LadyHawk]

Part II this is II of V.

In the West, approaches to resolving conflict focus primarily on communication by aggrieved parties, negotiation, compromise, and agreement. Most importantly the emphasis is on outcome, i.e., resolution. In practice, compromise can leave seeds which blossom into future conflict. Since many of the conflicts are polarized and seldom resolved, they can fester into larger ones. An easy example for understanding this is divorce.

A couple with children get divorced. The fight between them continues, even though the divorce is final. The children get caught in the middle and develop problems of their own. These problems, whether psychological or social, begin to involve a number of other parties. People who were friends and offered support to the couple pull away or take sides. The conflict, originally between two people, spreads into more and more people's lives. Soon, the original unhealed conflict is eclipsed by these other issues.

From a shamanic perspective, these conflicts are spiritual. The source of these conflicts may not be readily apparent, being hidden from ordinary modes of perceiving and understanding. Having a shamanic worldview helps people understand the damage being done on a spiritual level. Michael Harner makes the point in an interview:

From a shamanic point of view, all people have a spiritual side, whether they recognize it or not. When people get angry, jealous, or have a hostile emotional attitude, they can vent not only verbal and physical abuse, but spiritual abuse without even knowing it. In other words, if somebody is ignorant of shamanic principles, they can do damage to other people on a spiritual level This doesn't mean you shouldn't get angry at people. It just means that you should have discipline and know there are parameters. You can get angry with somebody and verbally let out steam and at the same time control your spiritual side.4
In many of the cultures I have researched, rituals and ceremonies are practiced to support the expression of these energies. Among certain tribes, a common practice is to barely whisper your angry feelings as you walk by a person with whom you are in conflict. Malidoma Somé describes "ash circles," used by the Dagara for conflict resolution. After a ritual of "truth-telling" in front of the community, wherein both parties in conflict are given the opportunity to state their side of the disagreement without interruption, they retire to a sacred space created by a circle of ash. The "ears," not only of the tribe are present, but also of the ancestors and spirits. As the two persons in conflict enter the ash circle, each takes a mouthful of water from one of two bowls. To the Dagara, water symbolizes peace and life; ash symbolizes protection. They face away from each other, eventually spitting the water out. They then face one another and scream at each other wildly, but without physical violence. At some point a catharsis occurs and they throw the remaining water in the bowls on each other, ending the ritual in tears and grief release. The community also is actively involved by verbalizing the importance of the conflicted parties to the tribe, playing a key role of support, and personal affirmation.5

Among the Yanomami, a form of ceremonial dialogue called wayamou is used. In preparation for this ceremony, the aggrieved parties paint their bodies and adorn themselves. As they enter a sacred circle, they are greeted with shouts, whistles, and the sounds of arrows beating on the walls. They get into hammocks. The Elders may say a few words. Often, they are offered tobacco to chew and perhaps some food.

Once night falls, the dialogue begins. They argue, with full and open expressiveness, saying what they need to say. In the turn-taking, the listener must do so meekly, awaiting a turn to speak out. The volume and tempo of the exchange tends to go in waves. At some point there is a "calming" and the anger subsides. The ceremony always ends at the beginning of the new day's light, after which there is a gift exchange and sharing of food.6

In the Kalahari Desert of southern Africa, the Ju/'hoansi integrate the relieving of conflict tensions within their dancing healing rituals. (The use of dance for the resolution of conflict is used in several Melanesian cultures as well.) Partly, the intent of the dance is to bring the people together to honor each group member's importance to the tribe. If two women are at odds, others will arrange for them to be next to each other in the singing circles, hoping that sisterhood between them will be re-established. Inherent in their approach is the belief that these tensions can create illness in the group. It is common for them to express these tensions as healing occurs within the dancing healing ritual. An example of this ritual expression, related to an ongoing dispute about a prospective divorce, resulted in the energy of the dance lacking power and the singing being flat. Rather than being a full circle of singing women, they had broken into two curved groups.

Arguments begin between the two lines of women, shouts about each other's 'stinginess' or 'bad manners.' The shouting escalates, dominating the dance for a moment. Then two older women, facing each other at opposite ends of the two lines, bring the angry exchange to a climax. Suddenly, as each feels some redress has been won, they agree to resolve their differences and move on with the dance.7

>The circle reconnected and eventually the mood lightened and laughter broke out. The healing dance was then able to continue rather than be poisoned by the conflict.8

Not all of these rituals and attempts to diffuse tensions are so openly expressive. The Jivaro (also known as Shuar) shaman, for instance, buries a lance (said to contain the animosity between the conflicting parties) in a place hidden deep in the forest so the antagonists cannot uncover it.10 The Iroquois Nation held council to resolve problems and conflicts within the confederation. In some cultures, very specific rituals for presenting one's case to the Elders exist(ed). These often involve(d) deep questioning and an attempt to make right through actions as well as prescribed ritual. The Hawaiian practice of Ho'Oponopono is an example of this type of ritual.10

In the west, it is not uncommon to have jealousy and envy played out against leaders. In essence, these are attacks on personal power. These attacks can be ongoing, ceaseless, and relentless. By contrast, the Zulu have a ritual day once each year when the warriors denounce the king. In this ritual, they may blame his actions, call them base and cowardly, oblige him to explain, question his explanations, and even threaten and express contempt for him. However, this is done only within the ritual context and is not continued afterward.11

Among the Yao, the king is attacked upon his installation. He is symbolically struck on the head, passes out, is given a funeral, and is reborn. This ritual of death and rebirth, initiates the king into a higher status role, one believed to be spiritually empowered. The ritual ends with a display of support for the king.12

These examples indicate the range of responses to conflict that are practiced. The following case histories are offered as examples of the application of shamanic methods to heal conflict here in Western culture. Four different categories of examples are offered: personal, interpersonal, family, and community.