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| Cabin Fever Stay-at-home-moms, its time to strut! Mom groups, schedules, and keeping your sanity while trying to shower regularly. |
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07-07-2010, 12:57 PM
| #11 (permalink) |
| Beauty              Join Date: Oct 2006
Posts: 22,642
            
| Yes...can't they just eat together?  I make lunch for us all and so does dh if I'm not here. He has to do something while she eats, so he might as well eat with her
__________________ As the saying goes, when a door slams shut in one place a window opens somewhere else. After staring at the door for many years, it finally occured to me to go look for the open window. I discovered I like sunlight and warmth much more than peeling old doors anyway, so I climbed out the window and reveled in my discovery. I will never sit behind a closed door again, no matter how comfortable my chair becomes. Me  |
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07-07-2010, 01:34 PM
| #12 (permalink) |
| Hobbit at heart       Join Date: Apr 2008 Location: Somewhere in Middle Earth
Posts: 4,307
    
|  He just likes to have his quiet time while eating lunch so he can browse the 'net Come to think of it, the only meal he eats with her is dinner and that's b/c I put my foot down that the family had to have dinner together. MB - he gets anxious easily which may be why he likes to do only ONE thing at a time (and by 'time' I mean day ) And yes she'll be in first grade in the fall, he's planning on working on his photography "full time" while she's in school, with an eye towards commercial and business photography. Thx for the reality check... I guess i need to have  a talk with him, oh joy...
__________________ "You are never given a wish without also being given the power to make it come true." -Richard Bach, The Bridge Across Forever http://bringingupmuffin.blogspot.com |
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07-07-2010, 01:41 PM
| #13 (permalink) |
| Beauty Join Date: Oct 2006
Posts: 22,642
| Yes..that is what always comes when you talk about why he does things how he does things. The expectation of being able to cope with things is a scary thing for him I think The good news is whatever happens she will be in school soon and he can do one thing at a time all day...or maybe the bad news 
__________________ As the saying goes, when a door slams shut in one place a window opens somewhere else. After staring at the door for many years, it finally occured to me to go look for the open window. I discovered I like sunlight and warmth much more than peeling old doors anyway, so I climbed out the window and reveled in my discovery. I will never sit behind a closed door again, no matter how comfortable my chair becomes. Me |
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07-07-2010, 01:58 PM
| #14 (permalink) |
| Hobbit at heart Join Date: Apr 2008 Location: Somewhere in Middle Earth
Posts: 4,307
| he didn't get much housework done when he was unemployed before Muffin was born, so I will not expect much but I DO expect him to maintain the house, especially since he doesn't like me to do it. He does have an eye to make sure the fixin's done right, just not the hands
__________________ "You are never given a wish without also being given the power to make it come true." -Richard Bach, The Bridge Across Forever http://bringingupmuffin.blogspot.com |
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07-07-2010, 02:08 PM
| #15 (permalink) |
| Somewhere there's a bathtub with my name on it     Join Date: May 2008
Posts: 43,229
          
 
| He's also teaching her, by default, how to cope with stuff. That is, not to cope with it because more than 1 thing at a time is anxiety producing.  I wouldn't be okay with that.
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07-07-2010, 04:51 PM
| #16 (permalink) | |
| I solemnly swear that I am up to no good    Join Date: Jan 2010 Location: Somewhere between The Leaky Cauldron and The Prancing Pony
Posts: 904
| Quote:
I get that men are not wired like women and have certain shortcomings to deal with domestic duties, but I really don't think you are asking too much. How often do we as mothers load up cars of kids and trek into the grocery stores, or find some way to entertain the kids while we do the housework? We don't complain because we've all been raised to believe that it's expected of us to do that. You aren't crazy to ask him to take one kid who is 6 years old in to Home Depot. It's really not that hard. If he has anxiety issues, then they need to be dealt with, but no, I don't think you're expectations are too high.
__________________  M,  Pagan Mama to  B (16 ) and  G (9) . | |
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07-07-2010, 10:13 PM
| #18 (permalink) |
| Wants to get it on in a double shot DD coolata    Join Date: Jul 2008 Location: Wasting Away in Maragaritaville
Posts: 7,511
| I fear my 3 monsters will push him over the edge friday seriously tho I can understand both sides here...I dont eat with the kids all the time because when I try to I actually dont get to eat. I often eat after they do so I can actually eat more than one bite before having to get up and get something for one of them  Perhaps pick the one thing that is of highest priority for him to accomplish and see if he can work on that one thing  like dishes or something.Id love to be able to run an errand with just one or even 2 kids but my DH has never ever taken more than one out by himself..and has yet to stay home alone with them without calling his own parents for help  and she still naps at 6? omg i wish...even the 2 yr olds are on the verge of quitting naps 
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